


Tester

by yeaka



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: M/M, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:01:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21527164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeaka/pseuds/yeaka
Summary: Noctis asks Prompto for a favour.
Relationships: Noctis Lucis Caelum/Ignis Scientia, Prompto Argentum/Ignis Scientia
Comments: 11
Kudos: 85





	Tester

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own Final Fantasy XV or any of its contents, and I’m not making any money off this.

Prompto’s been over to Noctis’ apartment hundreds of times, but this is easily the weirdest one. He was asked to dress nicely and told not to bring anything—Noctis said that Ignis would be there but not to make them dinner, so he might want to eat beforehand, but not too much. He asked if he could bring over Justice Monsters X, but Noctis said they wouldn’t be gaming. Prompto asked if they’d watch that new CGI thriller about a tribe of tall half-rabbit women, but Noctis said they wouldn’t be watching anything either. Prompto’s not sure why he _is_ coming over. But he does, and he sits down on Noctis’ couch, noticing that Noctis’ posture is absolutely rigid and things haven’t been this awkward between them since elementary school.

Noctis takes a long moment before he even says anything, and then he breathes out, “Dude, I gotta ask you something.”

“Okay?” To Noctis, he’s an open book. Noctis can ask him literally anything. 

“Like, something really weird. A royal protocol thing. And I wanna make it clear that you can absolutely, one hundred-percent say no. I just... you’re my first choice, but you really don’t have to do this.”

“Buddy, you’re scaring me.”

“I need you to fuck Ignis for me and then fill out some paperwork saying he’s good in bed.”

“What?”

Noctis doesn’t repeat himself. He just shifts uncomfortably and stares at Prompto, who stares back. There’s no way he heard that right. After a long, tense moment, he meekly repeats, “You want me to... f... fuck Ignis? And then... paperwork?”

Noctis nods. “I know. It sounds crazy. But, like... I’m the prince, so... no one’s supposed to sleep with me unless they’ve gone through a designated tester, and, well... I’m nominating you?” He hurriedly adds, “But you can say no! Seriously. Just say the word and we’ll never speak of this again.”

Prompto’s mouth works open and closed like a fish gasping for air on the beach. He feels just as confused as that fish would be. Noctis fidgets and mumbles, “It’s just... y’know Iggy and I have been together for a while, and I really want to... y’know... but he really cares about doing things ‘the proper way’, so he wants to follow royal protocol, and... uh... yeah. Believe it or not, there’s actually forms for that.”

Prompto has so many questions. He wants to know who wrote those forms. He wants to know _why_ they wrote those forms. He wonders if whoever’s filling them out needs to have some kind of professional experience. He wonders why anyone would even expect Ignis to have any forms at all, because obviously he’d be spectacular in bed—everyone who’s ever met him must assume that. He’s an elegant, gorgeous, mesmerizing creature that really knows his way around a pole-arm.

And maybe Prompto has thought about sleeping with him once or twice, but those were just the idle fantasies of a young adult mind. Obviously he’d never _actually_ mess with Noctis’ and Ignis’ relationship. Noctis is his best friend. His super, _super_ lucky best friend.

Noctis quietly asks, “Don’t freak out on me?”

Somehow, Prompto winds up just blurting out, “Is Ignis okay with this?”

“Yeah, he’s in the bedroom waiting for if you say yes. But you can say no and go home if you want, and we’ll try Gladio.”

“Nope!” Prompto barely even has time to process that tidbit before he’s shooting off the couch. His body’s just automatically snapped to attention. He can’t afford to take time to think about it. He’d like the time, but he’s certainly not about to miss the opportunity and let that pass on to someone else. He tries to calm himself down enough to look stoic instead of wildly eager when he answers, “I’ll do it.”

“Really?” Noctis blinks, then adopts a genuine smile that blows Prompto’s mind. “Seriously?”

“No hard feelings, right?” Prompto just needs to be sure. Ignis is going to be amazing, he’s sure of it, but _nothing_ is worth risking Noctis’ friendship. “You won’t hate me afterwards?”

“Only if you fail Ignis,” Noctis snorts.

“You’re seriously the best friend ever.”

Noctis snorts again and grins. Prompto turns, rearing and ready to go, only to pause and double check. “So... should I be, like, taking mental notes, or being objective, or...?”

“Fuck no! Pass him no matter what—I don’t care if he’s terrible; I want him!”

Prompto laughs and salutes, while Noctis gets up and scurries off, promising, “I’ll get the paperwork. Hurry up and get on it—I’ve been thinking about this for weeks!”

“Yes, Your Highness!” And Prompto scurries off to do his royal duty.


End file.
